Chastity Is for Lovers

Single, Happy, and (Still) a Virgin

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Format: Paperback

Publication date: November 28, 2014

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Winner of a 2015 Catholic Press Award: Books for Teens and Young Adults (First Place). 

In 2012, journalist Arleen Spenceley outed herself as a twenty-six-year-old virgin in a Tampa Bay Times op-ed that went viral. In Chastity Is for Lovers, Spenceley expands on that piece, advocating Catholic teaching on sex and marriage with candor and humor, and without judgment.  

In her debut book, seasoned journalist and self-professed “happy virgin” Arleen Spenceley offers a mature, funny, and relatable vision of Catholic teaching on chastity for young adults. Chastity Is for Lovers provides perspective on a variety of topics—the difference between chastity and abstinence, how virginity is an affirming and valuable life choice, how the word “purity” can be harmful in ministry settings, how to date well, and why sexual self-control is the best form of marriage preparation—and gives single adults the best possible chance to find true love. She carefully avoids using language that shames readers and instead presents a view of chastity that is joyful and positive. 

Product Details

Pages: 160

Trim size: 5.5 x 8.5 inches

ISBN: 9781594714801

Imprint: Ave Maria Press

  • “Down-to-earth, honest, fun approach!”

    Chastity is For Lovers is a book that brings light to the beautiful truth that deep, authentic love comes from living an integrated, chaste lifestyle. Arleen Spenceley uses stories, personal experience, humor, and Church teaching to express what we all know deep in our hearts—we have desires that yearn for “something more” than this world offers, a love story that allows to live “life to the full!” People of all ages, states of life, and vocations can benefit from this down-to-earth, honest, fun approach to the misunderstood virtue of chastity.”

    Jackie Francois Angel
    Speaker, worship leader, and musician

  • “With clarity and charity.”

    “With clarity and charity, and a good dose of touching story, Arleen Spenceley has opened a space to discuss authentic chastity again. She does so not with a negative, repressive, or condemning tone, but with one full of joy, hope, and humor. She reminds us all to find, in every state of life, the truth that our hearts really long for: the deepest love, the one every heart is made for!”

    Bill Donaghy
    Curriculum Specialist and International Speaker
    Teacher at the Theology of the Body Institute

  • “Funny, honest, and insightful!”

    “A frank, funny, honest, and insightful look at one of the most important topics of our generation. Arleen beautifully unpacks what chastity is (and isn't!) and provides us with practical examples on how to live it in our everyday lives.”

    Bob Rice
    Author of A 40-Day Spiritual Workout for Catholics

  • “A masterful storyteller and writer!”

    “Arleen Spenceley is a masterful storyteller and writer, engaging the heart and the soul with every turn of the page. She doesn’t just have ‘a story to tell,’ she shares her own—with unrivaled rawness and authenticity—in a way that even the most cynical heart will be moved.”

    Mark Hart
    Executive Vice President
    Life Teen International

  • “A powerful resource.”

    “God always allows U-turns no matter how many mistakes we've made. But there also a better and truly beautiful way to live one's life and avoid the pain that comes when one doesn't follow God's perfect plan for sexuality. What a powerful resource Arleen is providing for women and men in today's over sexualized culture.”

    Teresa Tomeo
    Speaker, author, and syndicated Catholic radio host

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Additional Resources

NPR Interview Celeste Headlee
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America Magazine Q&A
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National Catholic Register interview
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