A Gay Christian’s Guide to Unlearning Rejection and Experiencing God's Extravagant Love
Author: Eve Tushnet

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Format: Paperback

Publication date: December 3, 2021

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Winner of a second-place award in the category gender issues, inclusion in the Church from the Catholic Media Association.

What would happen if gay Christians began to believe the truth about God—that he loves all people unconditionally?

In Tenderness, Catholic writer and speaker Eve Tushnet says trusting God’s love would be the beginning of a transformation, not only in the lives of gay Christians but also in the Body of Christ itself. She offers hope and companionship to those who have been deeply hurt by their parishes, a wound that also damaged their relationship with God. Tushnet also offers practical guidance from her own journey as a celibate lesbian.

Tenderness explores scripture and history to find role models for gay Christians—including Jesus, King David, Ruth, St. John, Mary, poets, mystics, penitents, leaders, and ordinary gay people who have found unexpected paths of love. The book also offers guidance on living through or recovering from the painful experiences that are all too common in gay Christian life—from familial rejection and weaponized Christianity to ambivalence and doubt. Weaving her own story with resources, prayers, and practical actions that can help gay people trust that God loves them, Tushnet renews our understandings of kinship, friendship, celibacy and unmarried life, ordered love, personal integrity, solidarity with the marginalized, obedience, surrender, sanctification, and hope.

This book is primarily for gay Christians, but it also offers a window into their experiences and needs that will make it useful for anyone in pastoral care or who wants to be a better friend to the gay people they know.

Product Details

Pages: 224

Trim size: 5.5 x 8.5 inches

ISBN: 9781646800742

Imprint: Ave Maria Press

  • “Thoroughly encouraging.”

    “Tenderness is a thoroughly encouraging reminder that the lives of traditionalist gay Christians, though sometimes marked by pain and rejection, often serve as stark examples of the beauty and dignity of redemption. With her characteristic wit and earthy humor, Eve Tushnet sheds light on obstacles that many non-straight Christians face in their lives while highlighting both the beauty and significance of faithful obedience to the Word of God. Although directed to traditionalist gay Christians themselves, anybody who wants to follow in the footsteps of Jesus will be encouraged by the testimony of our Father’s tender faithfulness that inspires this book.”

    Nate Collins
    Author of All But Invisible

  • “Timely and desperately needed.”

    “With grace, hope, and the conversational style of grabbing coffee with an old friend, Eve Tushnet has built upon her work in Gay and Catholic in a timely and desperately needed manner. She offers an abundant vision of the tender love of Jesus and the expansive ways in which we can receive that love.”

    Bekah Mason
    Executive director of Revoice

  • “Open, insightful, wry, and generous.”

    Tenderness is a book so open, insightful, wry, and generous that I devoured it in one sitting and wished it was longer. By turns hilarious, frank, heartbreaking, and ultimately hopeful, it is an inspired, irresistible read that manages to instruct without injuring and makes us long to bring about the world Eve Tushnet can see so clearly.”

    Elizabeth Scalia
    Editor at-large at Word on Fire Catholic Ministries

  • “A candle in the dark for many gay believers.”

    “There is no one who writes about the particular gifts and challenges of being gay and Christian with more prophetic insight, godly wisdom, humane sensitivity, and sheer good humor than Eve Tushnet. This book will be a candle in the dark for many gay believers who wonder whether the promises of the gospel really are for them, and it will help others in the Church see the beauty of God’s image in the faces of his beloved gay children. This is now the best guide in print for those of us who know ourselves to be gay and want to live a life of faith and hope in the love of God in Christ.”

    Wesley Hill
    Author of Spiritual Friendship: Finding Love in the Church as a Celibate Gay Christian

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